A public message from: The
Self Appointed
Nonviolent Truth
Avengers
To: The culprit entities COKE
and ET
Charge: Coke and ET deliberately
MISLED children as to the nutritional value of Coke, for selfish purposes.
Evidence: In ET, the leading child actor says of coke: "Its food"
Finding: Coke
has NO nutritional
use for the vast majority of Americans and probably contributes to tooth decay and obesity. Therefor it was misleading and probably harmful to call Coke "food."
Reprimand:
1. Ten copies of this letter to be mailed anonymously,
one each to culprit entities.
2. The slogan "COKE IS JUNK!" , optionally
signed "SANTA", to be written at ten
playgrounds.
3. The slogan "ET SUCKS"
to be written at five adult locations.
Comments:
1. SANTA hopes that reprimand #2 will discourage the
use of cocaine.
2. Since ET otherwise portrayed commendable values
of nonviolence and affection its punishment was reduced.
3. But SANTA does agree that ET vulgarly misused the
divine symbolism of Michelangelo; however SANTA concerns itself solely with
secular offenses.
4. To all advertisers: If the shoe fits,
STOP F**KING
WITH KIDS' MINDS YOU GREEDY A**HOLES!
WE ARE WATCHING! - SANTA